Things I’ve Seen So Far in the Blizzard

Holy shit people are crazy. So far I’ve seen a dude with a shovel that was about twenty feet long, standing on a scaffold scraping snow from his roof. And a man spent five hours scraping off his Cadillac. He was next door. Then he drove it around the block with four feet of snow on the roof of it. Now a man is crossing in front of our window on long cross country skis. Not using the poles, just walking basically, with a shovel in his backpack. People were snowblowing the sidewalks right in the midst of the blizzard, the snow just not giving a fuck covering up their trail like that sweeper thing in Alice and Wonderland. The funniest thing has been watching the two guys trying to shovel their roof. And then this guy that looked like he was going to croak right in front of his door as he tried to shovel his walk. (Young dude or I would be nicer.) People are going mad trying to clean up the snow. I’m like, fuck it, it’s the weekend, my restaurant’s closed again, I’m not opening my door! It looked way prettier before these people fucked it all up with their incessant need to clean shit up or whatever it is that drives them.

2 thoughts on “Things I’ve Seen So Far in the Blizzard

  1. *peers out window* “Yep, still snowing.”
    *grabs shovel, and walks to front door thinking he might clear the front walk in case he needs to get out later, the door creaks open, the moisture and the ice in the air freezing the hinges, fighting to keep the door closed. the blast of winter strikes him full in the face as he gazes into the snow covered madness beyond his front stoop* “Fuck it, I’m going to watch some TV.”

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