My skin itches like crazy all over the place and then I scratched my eye now I can’t even type I can’t hardly see shit. 

It just be dry as a Triscuit in the air around here.

My wife told me to floss when I came out of the bathroom too quickly and I couldn’t do it because it seemed so ridiculous and now she’s mad at me.

The cats are snoring and my stomach is churning with all the greasy chorizo. 

I didn’t drink much in preparation for writing something worthwhile tonight but she didn’t fall asleep and we watched Finding Dory in its entirety.

Now she’s flossing and it’s midnight and I’ve got to go to sleep.