I went home. I got back. I forgot to post yesterday. That’s a chink in my plan to post every day until 2018. Since I failed, I would usually give up now. So instead I’ll just post twice today and keep it going.
I’m afraid to change things here on this blog because Gordon Flanders is a nihilist and proud of it. Me I’m tired of seeming like I’m getting away with everything.
I’m thirty years old. I’ve been living ten years as a nihilist if not in action at least in thought. My life looks okay from the outside but my thoughts are fucked up. I got secrets.
And I’m finding out how much of a follower I am, philosophically. It’s okay to be unoriginal as long as you know it. I thought being nihilistic was the way that everyone should be, because it’s the truth that nothing matters. How could anything have value in a crazy world like ours.
But it turns out I bought my worldview at the same store as everyone else.
Stick around y’all. Looks like I’ve still got some interesting posts up my sleeves.
Dad wants to know if Obama was good at basketball. Mom wants to talk about the ‘aporkalypse’. Brother wants to talk about Rousseau. Anderson Cooper wants to talk about imminent nuclear war.
I went home and told some truths. It felt better than I thought it would. I haven’t started on the really big deceptions, or even the kind of big ones, but I am encouraged.
When you’re sitting alone in the train station clutching a plastic container of over cooked pasta, you’ll realize that her body is merely a manifestation of the joy within, and then you’ll regret with all your heart that you told her no.
Woke up feeling guilty. Leftover high from last nights dickin around w her ridiculous vape pen and walking in parks unknown. She was angry I had to go. Sounded so familiar the plea. How I broke away I don’t know. Too early to face her again, but it can’t be helped eh. That’s the life.
Today is hot? Says the girl in leather.
Today is cold! Says her friend in white.
You back away from a monster slowly, slowly back into hell.
I put my party bracelet on when the temperature hit 70 in New York. An old man said, “It’s spring! Finally!” Maybe he knows something.
On the way to work you couldn’t figure out what to do, especially since you were paranoid.
I showered and put on my best clothes, excited for the night. We would act like strangers. Forget all we knew about each other and come together based only on animalistic sexual attraction.
She said, Why are you dressed like a bartender?